The Camper and The Drowner

When serving, you meet so many different types of people but there are two that I run into frequently that I could definitely do without...

The Camper

Servers refer to people who sit at their tables for an extended period of time as campers. You serve them drinks, appetizers, entrees, desserts, and after about an hour of serving them, you drop the check off. The camper pays, but two hours later is still sitting at your table.

In busy restaurants, most servers get a 3 or 4 table section. Friday night I had a 4 table section. At one of my tables sat a party of 4 very self-involved guests. These people barely wanted to engage in conversation long enough for me to take their order. Every time I checked on them I felt like I was a bother [makes me wonder why you came to a restaurant if you didn’t want your waitress to do her job]. After they seemingly wrap up with dessert, I ask if they would like the check to which they respond, “You can bring the check, but we’ll be sitting here for a while.”  They wound up sitting at my table for 3 hours, which is practically half of the night.

What gets me about campers is that they don’t understand the economics behind serving tables. They will sit at your table forever and a day and still tip based off the check total. Campers never realize that in the time they’ve been sitting there, I could have had at least two more parties sit there and make approximately $10 in tips from each.

So my Friday night campers, true to form, tipped an 18% gratuity after sitting there for three hours and when the night was over, I wound up taking home the same amount I did on Saturday night with a three table section.

The Drowner

This one always makes me laugh, and insights usually rude responses from me. The drowner looks like they are literally drowning: one hand straight in the air flailing around to get the server’s attention.  If you go out to eat, please never do this. It is absolutely rude. Some variations of the drowner would be the snapper, the whistler, and the yeller.  It seems people often forget that they are neither the only people in the universe nor the only guests in the restaurant. There is no need to embarrass yourself, drowner, to ask me for a simple glass of water. I’ve already checked on you three times during the course of your meal, and I will most likely be at your table again in a matter of minutes. Take a deep breath.

In case you were wondering, when my guest did this over the weekend, I actually laughed in his face and asked him if he was drowning. He didn’t get it at first but when it hit him he sheepishly said, “Ha, you’re so funny.”